Mommy versus Hayden.
The test of consistency, strength and will.
I swear this toddler bed is going to be the death of him.
{and I use the word death very loosely, btw}
Most people would underestimate the will and intelligence of a 20 month old...
...not me...
This kid is NOT dumb. On the contrary, he is very very intelligent.
He knows the rules. He knows the consequences. And He KNOWS when he is caught.
But just so there is never any confusion, when I lay him down for a nap I say, and I quote:
"Hayden, it's naptime. You need to lay down and go to sleep. Mommy will come and get you when it's time to get up. If you get up before I come to get you, you will get a spankin' {yes, I said spankin'}. You need to obey mom."
Not once. Not twice.
Four times. I go up and *deal* with him.
FOUR.
Bah!
He doesn't make it easy on me....I've walked in on him pulling his clothes out of his dresser drawers....rearranging his furniture...
...putting his shorts on his head and saying 'Hat! Yay!'
Yeah, tough guy mom, spank that!
Reasoning won't work. His favorite word is 'Huh?'
Timeout won't work....it's naptime.
Apparently, he needs to nap in a closet with padded walls and nothing else.
Note: I do not endorse hitting your child. Please note there is a clear and concise difference between HITTING and SPANKING. Spanking is our discipline of choice under the vice that is is controlled and calmly and consistently applied. It is not our 'last resort', as I believe this fosters the idea that 'Mommy is sooo mad NOW she's going to hit me.' Please note the difference, and if you have any questions, feel free to e-mail me, I'd be more than happy to answer your questions! I don't claim to know if all, but I am doing my best to be a consistent parent in all areas....and that includes discipline.
12 comments:
I'm really not looking forward to that transition! I'm sure there will be many a {loving, properly applied non abusive} spanking before we are through.
I feel ya on this one. God so graciously gave us the child with the will of steal when he gave us our Jay. :) WOW. I never knew a kid could stand his ground for so long until I met him. Oh.my.
Consistency is the very best thing. oh so hard sometimes, but you are doing the right thing for sure!!
My daughter is 21 months, and we moved her to a bed because she was climbing out of her crib. At bedtime, she doesnt do too bad. Naptime, though, she prefers to lay at her door and cry. I have been consistent with her and its slowly getting better. Hang in there!
I agree that discipline is not easy. I love my son and want him to understand that I love him and don't want to have to discipline him. I try to remember Proverbs 13:24 and Hebrews 12:6-11 as helps. Discipline should never be done out of anger, frustration, or spite, but rather out of love.
I know what you mean! We went through this with Seth and I'm not looking forward to moving Noah next month. Seth does not have a dresser in his room or hardly any of his clothes for that matter. :S But he found other things to do, like pull up the floor register vents and pick at the carpet padding, drop his pacis down the uncovered register vents (Jon finally screwed them down, pinch his fingers in the closet door, unplug his monitor, etc...
Then he would lay by the door and cry until he fell asleep. He was probably close to 2 1/2 before he stayed in his bed for good.
I gotta laugh at this one. Trust me, you will someday look back at these "issues" and see them as good memories. I did the same thing. One time my daughter took all her bedclothes off the bed and all the clothes OUT of her drawers. All in a pile in the middle of the room. I am not even sure of my reaction that time. All things will pass. She is now 17. :)
Those days are probably closer than I realize... :)
I respect what you said about the spanking thing and how you worded it. My daughter pointed out the bathroom at Starbucks last day and loudly said, "look mom, that's where you spanked me." the looks I got!! I wish more people would take the time to understand "spanking done right."
Sorry, Katie, but I just had to laugh at this! We aren't there yet with Cora. She loves her crib so she's staying in it until she's 4! No seriously, because I KNOW that child won't stay in a big girl bed!
Gotta love these strong willed kiddos!
-Tiff
I remember the transition from crib to bed with 'Nator'... I couldn't keep her in our bed. I was taking up 1/2 of it with my pregnant belly and body pillow and she tossed and turned in her sleep. Long story short, we ended up putting a baby gate on her door. In the morning, we found her sleeping on the floor by the gate with her blankie and baby. Oh, the guilt. Mommyhood is just plain hard sometimes.
Oh boy, do I remember those days! My kids also received spankings if they dared venure out of bed. So the whole "getting out of bed deal" was resolved, but then the "continuing to holler and refuse to sleep" issue began. Keep being consistent.. it'll pay off in the end! ;)
Dealing with the change to big beds is tough. I have heard of parents removing items from the room and just having a bed in it. Maybe that would help? Good luck!
As a fellow mom I have to say I appreciate your way of thinking on discipline but I hate that you have to disclaimer it on your own blog!
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